CollabSystem Is Dead Too

CollabSystem today denied the absence of rumours of its demise. Customers can be reassured that CollabSystem is rumoured to be dead too.

 ‘We know all the leading collaboration solutions are rumoured to be dead. We were disappointed that the recent AWS outage did not accelerate the spread of rumours of our demise.’

CollabSystem’s Head of Product Marketing said,

‘However, I am happy to confirm today that rumours that we are dead do exist’

CollabSystem has been carefully tracking rumours of its demise. The company can confirm that these rumours while small now are trending well. CollabSystem confirmed that a blogger in Norway recently suggested that CollabSystem was ‘pining for the fjords‘. The Head of Product Marketing said,

 ‘We appreciate a good Monty Python reference like everyone else. We can even go further and paraphrase Mark Twain to say the rumours of our health have been greatly exaggerated’.

CollabSystem will take all steps to ensure it has an industry standard rumour profile.
CollabSystem noted its competitors aren’t as dead as they are rumoured either.

‘People have been saying Yammer’s dead since it started. They’re still growing and kicking us around’

said the Head of Product Marketing,

‘IBM, Facebook, Google, Slack, Microsoft, VMware, Jive and so on might be able to point to lots of rumours, but we know they are all large well funded companies with the resources to get collaboration right and help customers with the important work of adoption. Their partner networks really help spread the rumours too. We are not so lucky.’

CollabSystem remains on track to make Greaper Technology Analyst’s Magic Graveyard for Workplace Collaboration Solutions in its next report due late 2017.

‘We just missed the Magic Graveyard in the 2016 report but we are confident that with help from our Norwegian friend and some dubious social media marketing we will be there in the next report with all the Leading players in our industry’

said the Head of Product Marketing,

‘Customers can be reassured we will be mentioned as dead as often as the other solutions very soon.’

CollabSystems is a small poorly funded startup with marginal collaboration products that depend on human behaviour. Those products like Walking, Talking, & Working might disappear any minute. CollabSystems is only in it for the money so it could be acquired by a major player and shuttered at any moment. 

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